Dear Marauder
by NoBodyOfInterest
Summary: The school year is over but the Marauders still have plenty to say to each other but there is no way they could cause any trouble through letters. Is there?
1. Are you guessing?

**Hey guys I know I have updated a lot today but really I was just sitting at my computer waiting for it to update. Then I was waiting for the clue to appear. And now I'm waiting to get my email so that means updates for you guys which is good if you like my stories, if not then why are you reading this?**

**So hope you enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING**

Dear Padfoot

Hey guess what? Are you guessing? I bet you're not.

Well seeing as you weren't guessing anyway I won't tell you.

Just kidding but seriously my parents got me tickets to THE MATCH AGAINST THE CANNONS AND PUDDLEMERE UNTIED!  
>And yeah that's all.<p>

Na they got enough so you Moony and Wormtail can come too.

Hope the family isn't giving you too much grief.

Prongs.

Dear Prongs.

You fell off you broom? Evans is dating Snivellus? What do you mean I'm not guessing?

I WAS GUESSING YOU PRAT

AWESOME THE CANNONS FOR THE WIN!

Well you know me and my family well enough to know that darling Regulus is being a stuck up prat, my lovely mother is screaming at me at every chance she gets, and my wonderful is constantly saying how much of a disappointment I am so business as usual in The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black.

Padfoot

**So this story is simply going to be letter correspondence between the Marauders during the holidays between fifth and sixth year (maybe longer). Each chapter is going to be very short as it will just be one letter and its response but it should hopefully be updated often.**

**Please feel free to criticise or to tell who or what you would like to see or hear about.**

**See ya later peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest**


	2. Sirius says stop being a prick

**Hey peopleoids.**

**Disclaimer: nothing is owned (by me at least) **

Padfoot

Yeah your family is the worst.

Well maybe not the worst but you know.

Any so my mum says you can come to our house on Saturday at around 12 sound good? Bad? If bad live it 'cause that's the only time you get.

Hey I heard you went to see Moony and I must say I am hurt by both you and Moony.

And because of the aforementioned knowledge of your location if I am wrong I'm sure Moony will send this to you in due course.

Hey sounds like your family is having a good holiday maybe you shouldn't come seeing as you're having such a great time.

Prongs.

P.S. The Chudley Cannons will never win mate so just get over it.

Dear Prongs.

It's Remus here as you can probably tell from the fact that you can actually read my writing and this letter doesn't smell like wet dog.

I am writing this to you because Sirius was highly offended by your last letter and said he wasn't going to talk or write to you.

Sirius would also like me to mention that the Cannons will win they have just had a off season. Personally i agree with you seeing as the Cannons are hopeless and you can hardly call it an off season if they haven't won a game in two years.

Also Sirius wants me to tell you that 12 is good and he is coming regardless of your twisted views of a great time.

Okay I am finishing this letter even though Sirius wanted to say more because frankly my arm hurts from being his scribe.

Moony.

P.S. Sirius says stop being a prick.

**Well that's that.**

**REVIEW (please)**

**See ya later peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest**


	3. WE DON'T NEED YOUR RELATIONSHIP ADVICE!

**Hey guys how are things? Hopefully they're good.**

**Disclaimer: Disclaiming.**

**Now onto the story.**

Dear Wormtail.

What's up? I haven't talked to you for ages while you were in France but how was it meet any French girls for you to date? Or me? Or Moony, goodness knows he needs to date someone and get over the whole furry little problem thing. Or Prongs might make him get over Evans.

But now you are back and we can all catch up.

Oh and did James tell you HE GOT TICKETS TO THE CANNONS but both him and Moony keep saying that they'll never win THEY WILL SOMEDAY.

Anyway so me and Moony are going to James house at 12 on Saturday and we wanted to make sure that worked for you as well, if it does reply and see you on Saturday, if not then CLEAR YOUR SCHEDULE, reply and see you on Saturday.

Padfoot.

Padfoot

Not much happened in France mostly just visiting my grandmother who kept trying to make me eat snails. So no French girls sorry. But I agree Moony needs to get over that but I'm not sure about Prongs I think he really likes Evans.

Yes James did tell me about the Cannons game against Puddlemere United but I don't think the Cannons will win sorry.

Yeah Saturday is fine I'll see you guys then.

Wormtail.

**(BONUS LETTER)**

Dear Padfoot.

We are sending you this letter to point out some things that Wormtail informed us of in your letter to him.

Moony does NOT need a girlfriend and is perfectly happy being single.

Prongs WILL NOT get over Evans as she is the most amazing girl ever to walk this Earth.

WE DON'T NEED YOUR RELATIONSHIP ADVICE

Yours Sincerely, Messer's Moony and Prongs.

**There you go I guess.**

**The poll for the Shell is now tied so more votes would be appreciated.**

**Also I am changing the review competition for The Simple Rules of Weasley Life and I'm Serious Sirius to now the first and second person to review on any of my stories will get to choose who can guest star and what subject Peter is failing. Basically first person to review get's to choose the story they decide something for. Second person get's to choose the thing for the other story.**

**See ya later peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest.**


	4. Oh my yet more betrayal

**Hey guys let's get straight to the story.**

Dear Prongs and Moony.

How did you guys know what I said to Peter did he betray me oh woe is me.

But Siriusly how did you guys both get together to write that letter are you now together oh my yet more betrayal.

That's all I have to say.

Padfoot

P.S. CANNONS WILL WIN TOMORROW WHEN I SEE YOU GUYS!

Dear Padfoot.

Yes Sirius Peter did tell us what you said as we asked him if he had been keeping contact with you.

As far as how we both managed to get our input into the letter that was simple I wrote the letter then sent it to Prongs before he sent it to you.

Because really Sirius neither of us want or require you love advice let's not forget what happened when you gave advice to Robert Finch in fourth year.

Sincerely Moony

P.S. Sorry Padfoot but there is no way the Cannons are ever going to win.

**(BONUS LETTER)**

Moony

Don't you worry about old Robert I hear his hair has almost all grown back now and I could have sworn that Karen Flitney fancied him.

As yes you and Prongs desperately need my advice especially Prongs.

Siriusly Padfoot

P.S. YES THEY WILL

**Well I hope you enjoyed. Please vote on The Shell poll and review!**

**See ya peoples**

**NobodyOfInterest**


	5. You are having troubles

**I own nothing. (Well I own some stuff but definitely not any rights to successful books).**

Dear Padfoot.

OH MY GOSH YOU ARE ALL COMING ROUND TOMORROW AND IT'S THE QUIDDITCH GAME. And really it's pretty exciting.

But really the holidays have been really boring seeing as Dad's been away for work so I can't play Quidditch with him. And my mum isn't going to play Quidditch so.

How are you Padfoot, still hiding from your family?

Well I'm too excited to keep writing so bye!

(A very excited) Prongs

Dear Prongs

Okay well you must have been more excited than you thought seeing as you somehow managed to send it to me instead of Padfoot.

I'm glad you're excited for tomorrow I'm sure Padfoot is (and you would know if you got the right address when sending letters).

I'm also sure Padfoot is hiding from his family really Prongs did you have to ask?

Too excited to write, and too excited to send the letter to the right place you are having troubles.

(A thoroughly amused) Moony

P.S. And yes don't worry I'll send your letter to Padfoot. (Though really it will probably already be tomorrow by the time it gets there).

**Well hope you liked this and feel free to tell me if you want something or someone to be brought into the story.**

**I will try to have a new chapter up in around another 4 days.**

**See ya peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest**


	6. Wishful thinking I guess

**Hey guys let's get on with the story.**

**I own nothing that is Harry Potter (because obviously I own some things).**

Dear Evans

How are things? Are you good? Will you go out with me?

I'm hoping your holidays have been good so far and that they will continue to be great. A good way to make your holidays better is by agreeing to go out with me, just a suggestion.

That is all I have to say to you Evans hope to hear from you.

James.

Potter

They used to be better. I was before I got your letter. And no.

My holidays were good until you started sending me letters, I would have thought my ignoring of your other TWENTY letters would have given you a clue, but that was just wishful thinking I guess.

And no I will not go out with you.

Lily

**That is all.**

**See ya peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest **


	7. Annoyed at the prick named James Potter

**I am back good people how are you? Good? Great? Excellent? I hope you are excellent.**

**Oh I am totally J.K. Rowling so I totally own Harry Potter because that's why I'm on fanfiction not off writing million dollars worth of books (if you didn't get it that was sarcasm I own nothing).**

Dear Padfoot.

I TOLD YOU THEY WOULDN'T WIN, I TOLD YOU, MOONY TOLD YOU HELL EVEN WORMTAIL TOLD YOU, AND NOW YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE BECAUSE IT'S TRUE! HA HA HA SWEET JUSTICE!

On a less happy note, Evans rejected me again. Why doesn't she like me Padfoot? How can I get her to like me? Oh you know what forget it you will be no help.

I have nothing else to say to you as you were wrong so you have to sit there in the Black House and be wrong okay.

Prongs (who was right)

Prongs

I KNOW YOU STUPID GIT, AND THEY JUST HAD AN OFF GAME IT WASN'T THEIR FAULT! THEY WILL WIN SOMEDAY, AND THEN I WILL BE THE ONE LAUGHING, NOT YOU OR MOONY OR WORMTAIL, ME YOU PRICK!

That's a shame. Wait you asked what you should do? I thought you didn't need my help Prongs who has the sweet justice now? (Hint it's me.)

But I will help you because I am just so nice like that. Write Evans a poem and make it really cheesy girls love that stuff.

I WAS NOT WRONG THEY WOULD HAVE WON BUT THE REF WAS BIAS AND THEY HAD AN OFF GAME!

Padfoot (who was NOT wrong and is annoyed at the prick named James Potter)

**What will happen next chapter? Will James take Sirius' advice and write a poem? Will Sirius ever give up on the Chudley Cannons? Will Severus get his revenge? Wait he's not in this story.**

**But seriously thank you for reading and please review it means the world.**

**See ya peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest**


	8. Snivellus smells

**Hey guys. I have a long weekend at the moment so I have been updating often and I hope you're enjoying these updates.**

**I still don't own Harry Potter come on guys did you really think I was J.K. **

Dear Evans

You did not seem impressed by my last letter to you so I thought I would try again.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your eyes are green. And I like you.

Flitwick is short. Slughorn is fat. Snivellus smells. But you know that.

Hogwarts is huge. As grand as can be. And you Lily Evans. Will you go out with me?

James.

Potter.

No I was not impressed with your last letter you arrogant toe rag get over yourself.

That was an awful poem Potter how could you even think I would like that you prick.

I will not go out with you Potter so why don't you save us all some time and stop asking.

Lily.

**Well guys hope you enjoyed that chapter and my awful attempt at poetry, feel free to use that poem on someone you want to go out with and tell me your results.**

**Also about The Shell I have gotten a final amount for the poll and I not be continuing that story.**

**See ya later peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest.**


	9. PS Next time I will watch you suffer

**Hey guys. I am back! *insert cheesy TA DA style music here*. But yeah here you go. And because I think you are all fabulous today we come to you with an EXTRA LONG CHAPTER *insert cheesy gasp then applause***

Dear Padfoot

Evans hated the poem you prick. This is why I don't need your relationship advice, I even sent you a copy of the poem, and you said it would work.

Prongs

P.S. Did you know you can send curses through the mail?

P.P.S. Do you know the counter curse for the Bat Bogey Hex?

Dear Prongs

Really she didn't like it. Personally I thought it was genius and very truthful seeing as you said Snivellus smells. And you do need my relationship advice Prongs, if you hadn't asked me you probably would have written the same poem but as a song, then tried to serenade her like you did in third year, only this time via letter.

Padfoot

P.S. Really? I may have to try that sometime...

P.P.S. She didn't? Really she did? HA!

Padfoot

You're a prick.

Prongs

Dear Moony

I found something new out today (because you're always encouraging me to learn). Anyway today I learnt that you can send people curses through a letter.

On a completely unrelated note,I was wondering if you knew the counter curse for the Bat Bogey Hex. In case, you know, a Slytherin tries to curse you because you beat them in a test again.

Prongs

P.S. Please reply quickly.

Dear Prongs

I already knew that you could send curses through letters. And I'm assuming because you are you, the reason you learnt is because someone sent you a letter containing a curse.

Oh completely unrelated, okay. I do happen to know the counter curse thank you for your concern for me. But seeing as you were just asking in concern for me I won't have to tell you the counter curse.

That's what happens when you try to kid me, I know Lily cursed you.

Sincerely, Moony

Moony

OKAY SHE CURSED ME OKAY? JUST PLEASE TELL ME THE COUNTER CURSE.

A desperate Prongs who is not afraid to beg.

Dear Prongs

I have in closed a copy of the book with the counter curse to the Bat Bogey Hex.

Sincerely, Moony

P.S. Next time I will just watch you suffer.

**That's it guys hope you enjoyed the EXTRA LONG CHAPTER *cheesy applause*.**

**See ya peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest**


	10. Disapproving look

**Hey guys yes I'm back I know you didn't miss me but hey.**

Moony

THE DAMN COUNTER CURSE DIDN'T WORK! WERE YOU MESSING WITH ME? ARE YOU ACTUALLY SNIVELLUS IN DISGUISE? HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME MOONY?

Prongs

Prongs

Try a different page you idiot.

Moony

Dear Moony

Oh yeah sorry, all better now.

Yeah so anyway what's happening in your life? How's the 'furry little problem' probably not great.

My Dad if back again now and we played Quidditch yesterday. I won

Prongs

Dear Prongs

Its fine I expected you to do something stupid like that.

Not much really been finishing the summer homework *disapproving look*, and reading quite a bit. Not great but thanks for your concern.

Good to know your Dad is back, now maybe you won't bother me as much (you probably will). And of course you won Prongs your Dad wouldn't let you lose.

Moony

Padfoot

MOONY JUST TOLD ME THERE WAS SUMMER HOMEWORK! DID YOU KNOW THIS? WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?

Prongs

Prongs

WHAT THERE WAS HOMEWORK? Actually you know what no problem we'll just ask Moony if we can copy. I mean he'll look at us with disappointment and refuse at first, but even he doesn't want us to fail (right?).

Also have you told Wormtail of this, after all we all know what he's like, he really doesn't like copying of Moony once he's gotten one of those disappointed looks.

Padfoot

Padfoot

Good plan.

No I haven't told Wormtail actually I'll go send him a letter now.

Prongs

**There you go. As you may have noticed the chapters have been getting longer (as far as amount of letters go) this is because I only like telling small chunks of the story in each chapter but I still want to get to an adequate place to stop.**

**See ya peoples**

**NobodyOfInterest**


	11. I WILL MAKE THAT HAPPEN EITHER WAY

**Hey guys. Sorry I have taken a while to update I have had some stuff to do plus I have been working on two other stories (well one chapter one story).**

Dear Padfoot.

We're going back to school soon. Though why I have to tell you I don't know you're the one who has been counting the days since you got off the train.

Now about our opening prank for the year, I think we should try something different than our usual 'mess up The Great Hall' and 'make inanimate objects insult the Slytherins' plan (though the second one could be worked in) and maybe try something with the classrooms. I was thinking starting school on a day with no class' or at least none that make any sense what do you think?

Prongs

Dear Prongs

I KNOW! I really can't wait. And I only started counting down since I got off the train because as we have discussed many times before MY FAMILY IS EVIL.

I have been thinking too my good Prongs after all it needs to be even bigger and better than all our past opening pranks. I like your idea (though we may have to get Moony to help with some of the organizing) but we can't ignore the genius that is making inanimate objects insult the Slytherins, I WILL MAKE THAT HAPPEN EITHER WAY PRONGS.

Padfoot

Padfoot

Okay well then here is my idea... Okay we make all the objects in each classroom stick to the ceiling, then when the teachers try to get them off the ceiling they fly out the room and go hide in other rooms. Okay we can make inanimate objects insult Slytherins (it is entertaining).

Prongs

**Well what did you think? Sorry about the not so great prank but I tried my best.**

**See ya peoples. **

**NobodyOfInterest**


	12. Of course we are not planning anything

**Hey guys. Well today we have some HUMOUR no more angst for awhile (sorry if you like angst). But seriously do tell me what kinds of stories do you like from me angst? Humour? Damn it I can't think of other kinds of stories I've written. Oh well tell what you like, what you want to see more of, or (/and I guess) what you may want to see that I haven't done yet.**

Dear Prongs.

I have heard of this plan of yours. Yeah you really weren't as sneaky as you thought.

Now obviously I cannot encourage all this pranking and disregard for rules. But let's say that I did decide to help you. Now what you are going to need a certain spell from Standard Book of Spells Volume 4 (page 72), a few assorted potions (the books you need may or may not have been sent with this letter), and you'll need to learn a timed levitation spell (check the book I got you for your birthday two years ago). That is to say if I was helping you which of course I could never do.

Moony

Dear Moony

HOW DID YOU FIND OUT? DID SIRIUS TELL YOU? OR WAS IT PETER? Wait I mean there is no plan what are you talking about my good fellow.

I see that would be quite a good idea but obviously there is no plan so that isn't necessary. But if of course there was a plan say, and you were helping us, where would one find a spell to make objects look like they were on fire? Of course we are not planning anything.

Prongs

Dear Prongs.

Well seeing as this conversation is completely hypothetical, you could find a spell that did that in the book you gave me last year (which if I was helping you would have been sent with this letter).

Moony

**Ah scheming Marauders what could be better.**

**See ya peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest.**


	13. It's so unjust

**Hey guys, I am back and on a new computer (not that you care). Anyway he reason I haven't updated in a while is I was away in Auckland, and I planned to update, but then half my computer keys broke (okay so not half around 9) and I would have had to copy and paste some letters in (seriously it would have taken me about ten minutes to just write this paragraph), so hopefully you can forgive me.**

**Onto the story at hand:**

Dear Padfoot

WHAT DID YOU DO? MOONY FOUND OUT YOU FOOLISH DOG!

But really it's quite handy that he did because if he was hypothetically helping us he would have sent us the spells and potions we need. Of course this did not happen as Moony would never help us.

WHO AM I KIDDING! Moony is helping us, not surprising really, he helps us all the time, YET THE TEACHERS STILL LIKE HIM! IT'S NOT FAIR I TELL YOU, he does just as much as we do yet no one seems to care.

Well that's it.

Prongs

Dear Prongs

Yes I admit I told Moony, but I had good reason to.

And you pretty much just explained my good reason. I knew that if Moony knew he would help us and we wouldn't have to look up any spells. You may now call me a genius.

I KNOW! It's so unjust. We should spite his wish to sound innocent by refusing to play along with his 'hypothetical' helping method.

Padfoot

Dear Moony

I was kidding when I said you were helping us with our prank of course you would never do such a thing, and anything that sounded like you were helping is purely hypothetical.

I am sorry if I insulted you with my unjust accusations (and next time please send a lighter hex).

Padfoot

**Okay guys this may be my last update for a while, as I have to go on camp soon *shudders*, then it's my birthday, then I leave for America, but hopefully I can get another update in during the week after… _camp_ *shudders***

**See ya peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest. **


	14. We kind of need some of it

**Hey guys, yes I am back from my trip to the place we call Americaland (well actually most people just call it America but that's boring).**

**Sorry about the huge wait, but I will be trying to get better. Please stick with me.**

**Here you go then.**

Dear Wormtail,

Have you done the holiday homework yet? I am reminding you as I know James and Sirius wont.

Also James and Sirius are planning yet another prank and should be sending you the details soon.

Sincerely Moony

Dear Moony,

There was holiday homework? For what classes? What books will I need? Also you are right James and Sirius wouldn't remind me.

Why didn't you send it to me?

Wormtail

Dear Wormtail,

Yes there was, it is for all the classes and no books should be needed as it was all things we learnt during the year, but if you need to check some things the books from last year should suffice.

I didn't send it to you as I didn't want to be able to be held responsible for anything that happens during the prank. Or at least less responsible than they will be held.

Sincerely Moony

Dear Wormtail,

GUESS WHAT! We gave the start of year prank organized, we have sent you all the details in this easy to manage kit.

Also do you happen to have any of that muggle super glue stuff? We kind of need some of it.

BYE!

Sirius

**Well that's it hope you like it, I was working on another story but as I may have mentioned the computer it was on has stuffed up won't let me type much on it so you may have to wait awhile for that, sorry.**

**See ya peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest**


	15. EARLY GRAVE!

**Hey guys. Seeing as I did such an awful job of updating I thought I'd give you two chapters.**

Dear Padfoot,

Did you ask Peter for superglue? He managed to glue his fingers together you idiot. Next time he does something like this because of you I will make you be the one who has to sort it out.

Moony, who is very sick of cleaning up after you

Dear Moony,

I might have implied that I wanted some superglue, but I didn't _make_, Wormtail glue his fingers together now did I? And seriously, Moony you sound like a worried mother, calm down and eat some chocolate.

Anyway you wouldn't let me sort it out, you'd be too worried that I would make matters worse.

Padfoot, who thinks Moony is overreacting.

Dear Padfoot,

Implied? Yeah right, you would have down right asked him, implying involves at least some amount of subtlety which you lack. And I can't eat some chocolate seeing as _someone_ stole it all.

You're right though. The time I let you sort anything out, is the time I want the world to end.

Moony, who does not overreact but will be sent to an early grave,

Dear Moony,

Thanks for the help with the prank, Padfoot came up with the idea of gluing the Slytherin's fingers together, but he said to thank you. So thanks.

Prongs,

Dear Padfoot and Prongs,

_EARLY GRAVE!_

Moony,

**Well, there you go. What will happen next? Just kidding, I don't even know yet.**

**See ya peoples,**

**NobodyOfInterest **


	16. In two words? James Potter

**Hey guys. As you may be able to tell, I feel really guilty about making you wait so long for any kind of update, so here you go.**

**Disclaimer: I haven't done one of these for awhile, feels a little weird. Not sure if I remember how. Just kidding because it's obvious I own nothing (yet).**

Dear Evans,

Seeing as we go back to school in two days, I thought I would give you one last chance to agree to go on a date with me before sixth year, (though if you have a sudden revelation in those next two days after I've asked you, I wont say no).

I wont write you poetry again as Moony burnt the last one saying it was too awful for eyes to ever see again (unlike you).

James,

Potter,

Well that changes everything, I won't get another chance to accept the date offer from the person who annoys me to no end and is an arrogant prick.

And, Remus is right, never write poetry ever again.

Lily

Dear Evans,

So that's a yes?

And it wasn't that bad.

James,

Potter,

Are you really _that_ thick-headed? NO I WILL NEVER GO OUT WITH YOU!

Lily

Dear Evans,

Why not? I'm awesome.

James,

Potter,

I think you've just explained why, you arrogant, thick-headed, rude, obnoxious, ignoramus.

Lily

Dear Evans,

What's an ignoramus?

James,

Potter,

In two words? James Potter.

Lily,

**Well there you go peopleoids, hope you enjoyed.**

**See ya peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest**


	17. The Kings of Sense

**YAY FOR UPDATES! Yes once again I am going on an update spree just to leave you for another few months. Sorry 'bout that.**

**TO THE CHAPTER!**

Dear Prongs

Have I ever told you how much I hate the Christmas holidays? Well I hate the Christmas holidays.

Padfoot

Dear Padfoot

That's a lie and you know it. You just don't like your family (which is understandable).

Prongs

Dear Prongs

You are not being a very good friend. You are meant to console me in my time of need, not point out my lies, that's Moony's job.

Padfoot

Dear Padfoot

I have no idea what you are talking about, I am an amazing friend. And as for that being Moony's job, Moony's not here and I felt the need to, what does he call it? Oh yeah, inject some sense into this conversation.

Prongs

Dear Prongs

I have no idea why he doesn't think our conversations have sense, we are full of sense, we are like the kings of sense in fact.

Also can I come to your house for a while my family wants to kill me (more than usual).

Padfoot

Dear Padfoot

You're right, we are, we should tell him just that.

My mum says you can come round tomorrow if you want, and she'll be making pancakes.

Prongs

Dear Moony

We have finally decided that we have had enough of your smarty pants comments about 'injecting sense into conversations', as we have decided we are very sensible and have as such also decreed ourselves The Kings of Sense.

If you have any problems with our declaration, please take it up with Peter as we really can't be bothered with it.

Padfoot and Prongs (The Kings of Sense)

Dear Padfoot and Prongs (The Kings of Nonsense)

The day you two become kings of anything like sense if the day that Peter joins the ballet and I stop eating chocolate.

Moony (The King of Being Exasperated By You Two)

**Well I suppose I'm done.**

**I shall also be trying to update Contrary To Popular Belief if you are following that, and that's about it.**

**See ya peoples.**

**NobodyOfInterest (The Queen of Lack of Updates)**


	18. King of Nonsense and Being Rejected

**Update spree, update spree, I'm going on an update SPREEEEEEEEE! (Please for the sake of pride (which is very limited as it is) imagine that as the last amazing note of a Broadway musical).**

**This is going on from the last chapter when James and Sirius decreed themselves the Kings of Sense. There shall be appearances from Remus (Royal Advisor and Duke of Exasperation and Chocolate), Lily (Queen of Insulting James and Fiery Tempers (or according to James The Queen of Beauty and Brilliant Eyes, but more on that later)) and Peter (The Royal Fool).**

**Disclaimer: Haven't done one of these in a while I think I've forgotten how to do one. Oh yeah I don't own anything. **

Dear Evans (The Queen of Beauty)

Did you hear? I am one of the two KINGS OF SENSE, and as such I decree that you are the Queen of Beauty and Brilliant Eyes. Also seeing as I am now the King of Sense, will you go out with me? After all who wouldn't want to date royalty?

Yours Sincerely James (The King of Sense and Love for Redheaded Females)

Idiot (King of Nonsense)

The day you are the king of sense is the day that I decide to go and jump of a cliff into a pit of poisonous snakes. And the same for the day I go out with you.

Lily.

Dear Evans (The Queen of Beauty and Brilliant Eyes)

Do you and Remus get together and have meetings as to how to insult us? Because he called me and Sirius the same thing and ad very similar ideas to yours as to when we would become The Kings of Sense (which is silly because we already are). And also about the whole cliff, jump, snake thing, does that happen to be one of your favourite hobbies that you do on a daily basis.

James (The King of Sense)

Dear Moony (Royal Advisor and Duke of Exasperation and Chocolate)

Evans rejected me again, and sent me another curse in the mail funnily enough; luckily I knew the counter curse for that one. I JUST DON'T GET IT MOONY, I'M ROYALTY HOW COULD SHE RESIST ME?

Oh and side note, do you and Evans get together to plan insults for me?

Prongs (The King of Sense)

Dear Prongs (The King of Nonsense and Being Rejected)

I think she could resist you the same way that she could resist you for being Quidditch Captain, being in the Marauders, and insulting Snape on a regular basis. You should really go to Sirius about these things he'll be far more sympathetic than me (after laughing and telling you to write truly awful poetry).

And no we do not we just both clearly have the same views on some of your traits, such as common sense (or lack of).

Moony (Who would be slightly insulted by his title but has to admit it's pretty fair)

Dear Moony (Royal Advisor and Duke of Exasperation and Chocolate)

BUT I'M NOT SURE WHY SHE COULDN'T RESIST ME BECAUSE OF THOSE THINGS EITHER! You know what Moony, you suck at giving kind and helpful advice, and as for why I'm not going to Sirius it's because when he was here the other day we got into another argument about how Puddlemere United is so much better than the Chudley Cannons, and he got mad (because he was losing) and ate my last pancake. YOU DON'T EAT A MANS LAST PANCAKE!.

So I shall now go and complain to Peter.

Prongs (The King of Sense and Pancakes)

Dear Wormtail (The Royal Fool (sorry but it seemed fitting))

Evans rejected me again, and I am coming to you in my time of need for consolation, as you are clearly my only friend left who is still nice to me.

Prongs (King of Sense and Pancakes)

Dear Prongs (King of Sense and Pancakes)

I'm sorry to hear that, don't worry she'll definitely say yes one day. And I heard about Padfoot eating your pancake though and I'm not really surprised, and as for Moony, wasn't he always a bit mean to you (in the nicest way possible).

Wormtail (Royal Fool)

**Hope you enjoyed this reading experience if you would please exit this story to your right, and we thank you for choosing to read Air OfInterest.**

**See ya peoples**

**NobodyOfInterest **


End file.
